Anxiety Attack Symptoms: Understand Them & Control Them

Anxiety is a brief, persistent, and extreme feeling of uncertainties, fears over tense and intense situations and constant worries that won't go away. Fortunately for anxiety sufferers it is controllable and, in fact, curable. As a matter of fact, anxiety is reversible, and can be successfully treated naturally if found out through the anxiety attack symptoms.

An anxiety condition is not an uncontrollable illness even if it feels like it is because it has complete control of your life. Anxiety attack symptoms occur for precise reasons and there are underlying reasons why your anxiety and anxiety attack symptoms continue.

To be able to know if you have anxiety, you should know first the anxiety attack symptoms. Here are some anxiety attack symptoms associated with most anxiety disorders. Of course, since every individual has a different chemical composition, anxiety attack symptoms and their intensity may vary from person to person.

The anxiety attack symptoms commonly experienced physically are:

Persistent fatigue, a feeling of electric shock, being unable to relax, a burning skin sensation, feeling cold, feeling light headed like you are about to faint, and an increased or unfortunately decreased sex drive.

More anxiety attack symptoms are twitching of the muscles, stiffness in the back, neck and shoulders, tingling in the extremities, persistent tense muscles, being very jumpy, twitchy and nervous, sweating a lot, urinating a lot and having weak muscles. As you can see, anxiety attack symptoms can be
 extremely debilitating.

More anxiety attack symptoms include chest pain, shortness of breath, having trouble breathing, trying to catch your breath, having a racing and or irregular heart beat, having a lot of headaches, becoming easily over excited, having a sore jaw that feels a lot like you have a toothache and
 grinding and clenching your teeth a lot.

Emotionally there are some very apparent anxiety attack symptoms that you need to watch out for like very dramatic changes in mood, emotional blunting, not having the right emotions at the right
time and feeling like you want to cry a lot but not knowing why.

Psychologically there are the following anxiety attack symptoms: a fear that you're going crazy and losing your mind, losing control of everything, feeling like there is impending doom, not being able to handle what's on your plate, being unable to concentrate, having racing thoughts and feeling like the problems of the whole world are on your shoulder. Sufferers also can suffer from depression and
 feel under extreme pressure about everything in their lives every day.

You may find this surprising but other anxiety attack symptoms affect your hearing with ringing in the ears, hearing rumbling sounds and reduced hearing or even deafness in one or both ears.
Other anxiety attack symptoms affect your vision like blurred vision, watery or dry eyes, seeing things that aren't really there, your eyes being very sensitive to light and even having spots in front of
your eyes.

Anxiety attack symptoms can affect your stomach and even the inside of your mouth with a constant craving for something sweet, having difficult swallowing and even choking at times, suffering from constipation or diarrhea, having a dry mouth and feeling like you've swallowed your tongue, suffering from a lot of gas and having a bloated stomach, having little appetite, feeling nauseous and
 having a lump in your throat.

Some prevalent anxiety attack symptoms include having difficulty sleeping, strange dreams, waking up feeling sick in the middle of the night, waking up in an anxiety panic attack and waking up feeling worse in the mornings.

These are the most common anxiety attack symptoms however the anxiety attack symptoms above are not complete or limited to the anxiety attack symptoms I've listed. It is likely for normal people to suffer from a few of these anxiety attack symptoms while some anxiety sufferers will unfortunately suffer from all of these life-altering anxiety attack symptoms.

About the Author

Do you suffer from any anxiety attack symptoms? If you do you are not alone. But there is help available and it doesn't have to include anti-anxiety medication. 1000s of people who suffer from anxiety attack symptoms have been cured in the comfort of their own home without medication, psychological visits and herbal remedies. Find out more at http://www.anxiety.getwhatyouwant1.com today!

Anxiety Attack Symptoms by Bill Burniece

Almost nothing can turn your life upside down faster than an anxiety attack can.
Anxiety today is a global problem. It affects millions of people around the world and from all walks of life. It can literally happen to anyone. Anxiety does not discriminate. When anxious feelings peak within us it can trigger physical anxiety attack symptoms that can make things miserable.
How miserable?

Anxiety attack symptoms can make you believe that you're having a heart attack, stroke, or other serious medical emergency. Because of this, many first time sufferers of anxiety attacks end up being rushed to the emergency room only to find out their condition is not life-threatening.

Anxiety attacks, also known as panic attacks, begin abruptly and last 10 minutes or so for most people. However they can last an hour or more in some cases.

Anxiety attacks are sudden feelings of extreme fear, terror, and discomfort. Anxiety or panic attack episodes can occur at any time - even when you're asleep. The most common anxiety attack symptoms are:

• Feelings Of Dread Or Fear
  
• Difficulty Breathing
  
• Feeling Out Of Control
  
• A Strong Urge To Flee Or Escape The Place You Are In
  
• A Choking Sensation
  
• Swallowing Difficulty
  
• Chest Pains Or Racing Heart
  
• A Sudden Fear Of Dying Or Going Crazy
  
• Shaking And Unsteadiness
  
• Breaking Out In A Sweat
  
• Dizziness Or Lightheaded
  
• Feeling The Need To Throw Up
  
• Stomach Cramps
  
• Hot Flashes
  
• Headache
  
• Chills

So what is actually occurring when you're experiencing these anxiety attack symptoms?
An anxiety attack is like a false alarm from our brain to our body. When were in true danger our body's fight-or-flight mechanism kicks into action to get us out of harm's way. When we are experiencing anxiety attack symptoms we have that same rush of fear and terror and all the physiological sensations that can go along with it, like a racing heart, sweating, tightening of the throat, and lightheadedness. The difference in an anxiety attack is that there is no immediate threat
present.

If left untreated, anxiety attacks can reoccur forming a pattern that can lead to an anxiety disorder. One of the worst effects of anxiety disorder is the increasing dread over when and where the next anxiety attack might occur. Dwelling on this possibility often triggers more anxiety attacks. It can become a frustrating cycle of dread and fear.

So what can be done to treat anxiety attack symptoms?
The good news is that anxiety is a highly treatable disorder. There are many methods available to treat anxiety attacks. The most common are psychotherapy, medication (antidepressants or natural herbal treatments), relaxation techniques, and cognitive-behavioral therapy. A combination of at least two of these methods has proven to be the most effective.

Doctors recommend taking antidepressant drugs to treat anxiety disorders in nearly every case. However, there are dangers associated with antidepressant use including addiction and severe side effects. Additionally, new research data suggests that antidepressants are ineffective in roughly half of all anxiety cases. That is a jarring statistic. Because of these facts the decision to use antidepressant drugs should not be taken lightly. This revelation has lead to a recent surge in demand for alternative natural anxiety remedies.

So what should you do?
If you're suffering from this condition the most important fact to understand is that anxiety attacks cannot harm you. Period! It's critical to understand this. Most people, especially those new to anxiety, start thinking of all the bad things that can happen during the anxiety attack, thus making the symptoms worse.

Start your recovery by increasing your awareness of what anxiety is and how to cope with it. Study anxiety. Once you understand the reality of what this condition is you can begin to train yourself to manage any anxiety attack symptom that comes your way.
Learn a wide variety of cognitive techniques to be used before and during an anxiety attack. This includes but is not limited to relaxation exercises, breathing techniques, visualization, and mental reprogramming. Seek out support groups either in person or anonymously online in numerous anxiety forums.

Try a good quality natural anxiety remedy before turning to more risky and addictive pharmaceutical drugs. If you see a doctor you may have to fight him on this point but it is ultimately your choice. Alternative natural medicines are less disruptive, far safer, and work just as well as antidepressants in many cases.

The bottom line is to take action. Do not allow yourself to succumb to the symptoms of anxiety attacks by remaining idle. If you feel you cannot take action alone seek help from loved ones or your doctor. Stop the nightmare of anxiety attacks now before your condition gets worse. The more proactive you are in your treatment and recovery the sooner you will get your life back under control.

About the Author

For more information on natural anxiety remedies go to: Natural Anxiety Remedy
Sign Up For A FREE mini-course for natural anxiety treatment: Treating Anxiety

Should You Take Antidepressants For Chronic Back Pain?

If you've gone to the doctor for back pain, you likely left with a prescription for some type of medication. People with recurring or chronic back pain are often prescribed antidepressants.

antidepressants are thought to be effective in treating pain because they increase the amount of neurotransmitters in the brain that decrease negative feelings like pain - both physically and mentally. Also, many people with chronic pain also experience depression, either due to the shared areas of the brain that process both physical and emotional pain or to the situational reduction of quality of life experienced by many with chronic pain. While using medication to target both conditions may seem sound, arguments against the use of antidepressants to treat chronic pain have been mounting for over a decade.

antidepressants don't cure the cause of back pain; when they work, they may simply mask the sensation of pain. These drugs are generally prescribed to people with nonspecific, or undiagnosed, back pain in lieu of treatments that address the unknown cause of pain.

Do They Work?
antidepressants were designed to affect brain chemistry as they do because it is hypothesized that abnormal brain chemistry, including a deficiency of key neurotransmitters, is one of the causes of clinical depression. While these drugs have shown to improve the lives of people with severe, clinical depression, they have not shown consistent results for people with chronic back pain. A number of studies have been done in recent decades to assess the use of these drugs for the treatment of various conditions. While some studies show that they can relieve back pain, others show that they are no better than placebos. The unpredictability of the effects are enough to make prescription of antidepressants for back pain questionable, yet they continue to be prescribed en masse.

Researchers for the Cochrane Library reviewed 10 trials that compared anti-depressant effects and placebo effects on people with back pain. They found that there was no difference in pain reduction between the medication and the placebo group in many studies and, at best, conflicting evidence in others. Review the study at http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/14651858.CD001703.pub3/abstract.

Risks
Even if an anti-depressant could relieve your back pain, there are risks of both short- and long-term use that must be considered. At first, they may cause hyper-alertness or the opposite, a sedated state. Other symptoms such as constipation, dry mouth, nausea, insomnia and headache are common. These may decrease as your brain gets used to the new situation.

Long-term use of these drugs comes with additional side effects. Weight gain and loss of libido are common, particularly in women. Abrupt cessation of SSRI drugs has been linked to nausea and dizziness. Some medical professionals warn against abrupt cessation of any anti-depressant for fear of psychological and physical withdrawal symptoms, while others maintain that there is no concern.

Aside from physical symptoms, long-term use of these medications can have a negative impact on you psychologically. One concern is tolerance; as the brain gets used to the drug's effects, the body may begin to perform processes to oppose it. This means that the drug ceases to be effective as the brain gets better at creating a ripe environment for depression. Recurrent depressive episodes and worsening of symptoms are possible.

This poses a concern particularly for people with chronic pain and depressive symptoms. For those being treated for pain exclusively, drugs are generally administered at lower doses and may or may not produce psychological side effects. However, dosages increase as physical tolerance builds up. See http://www.huffingtonpost.com/dr-peter-breggin/antidepressants-long-term-depression_b_1077185.html for more on tolerance and adverse effects.

The most frightening part of this discussion of risks associated with long-term anti-depressant use is that it is incomplete. antidepressants saturated the market before long-term studies were done to confirm their safety. It was only after years of use by children and teens that, in 2004, the FDA announced that anti-depressant use can increase the risk of suicidal tendencies in young people.

While these drugs can improve the lives of people with severe, chronic depression, their use by people with mild depression, chronic back pain or both is unsubstantiated; the risks may outweigh the benefits.

Alternatives
One main way to avoid anti-depressant use for chronic back pain is to find the cause of your pain and seek treatments that address it. A few commonly undiagnosed causes of pain are muscle imbalance, myofascial pain syndrome and sacroiliac joint dysfunction. Researching all possible causes of your pain and finding an open-minded doctor who will hear you out are the first steps to obtaining an accurate diagnosis.

For people with depression, there are ways to alter brain chemistry naturally. Diet, exercise and talk therapies like cognitive behavioral therapy have proven to do so. Cognitive behavioral therapy techniques can even be learned online for free.

Chronic back pain and depression don't destine you to a life of pills. Knowing the evidence, risks and alternatives associated with anti-depressant use for back pain can help you make informed decisions about your treatment.

Safe choices for pain management solutions exist. Educate yourself in alternative solutions for back pain management. Please ask questions, give comments or stories related to this article submission regarding back pain management.

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The Importance Of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy In The Treatment Of Depression And Anxiety Disorders

DEPRESSION and anxiety disorders are psychosomatic conditions, i.e., a combination of psychological and physical factors. While the physical (or somatic) component of the condition is treated with anti-depressants, the psychologcal component is treated through psychotherapy.

Psychotherapy involves talking to a mental health professional such as a psychiatrist, psychologist, social worker or a counselor who first identify the reason for an anxiety disorder and how to alleviate the impact of the reason on the patient's psyche. The particular type of psychotherapy that has been found very useful in treating anxiety disorders is: Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT). As its name suggests, CBT comrpises two elements: the cognitive element, and the behavioral element.

Cognitive element: The cognitive element of CBT helps people amend the thought structure that generates the fears and anxieties that have caused the anxiety disorder.

Behavioral element: The behavioral element of CBT encourages people to change the nature of their reaction to anxiety-causing situations.

Illustrations of how CBT works: Suppose a psychiatrist is treating a patient suffering from an obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) in which he or she is afraid of being infected by germs, so keeps washing hands repeatedly. A psychiatrist or a trained professional in mental health will allow this patient's hands to get dirty and wait for increasing lengths of time before allowing him or her to washing them. When this exercise has been repeated several times, and the patient find that no infection has been caused despite the dirty hands that remained unwashd for so long, his or her fears of infection through germs will decrease.

Another example of how CBT works is, say, in the treatment of social phobia. The patient is encouraged to be present in social situations he or she fears and is allowed to commit social errors or inetiquettes. It will then be pointed out to him that nobody has really noticed - or might have noticed but did not give it any importance, or, better still, some others too have committed the same errors and are yet socially very comfortable - the patient will become more receptive to the social setting he or she once feared.

CBT usually lasts around three months and is administered individually or in groups. It may begin directly with the patient or may begin with videos and pictures depicting the situation the patient fears and how he overcomes the fears.

Finally, CBT can only work with the patient's cooperation. The patient must acknowledge that an anxiety disorder afflicts him/her and must therefore want to take this therapy. Backed with administration of anti-depressant drugs, CBT can enable people with anxiety disorders live a normal and full life.

[http://www.nimh.nih.gov/]

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Treating Depression and Anxiety

Do not confuse depression with anxiety because they are different from each other though they may seem the same at first glance.

If you are experiencing a general feeling of negativity that you are easily saddened, angered, hopeless, despaired and irritated for the least provocative reason or even none at all, then you might have depression. On the other hand, if you feel anxiety, panic, worry or fear in circumstances which normally you shouldn't be feeling those emotions then you might have anxiety.

Anxiety may cause depression and depression may also cause anxiety disorders such as panic attacks, social phobia, obsessive-compulsive disorder and others. Depression and anxiety are not life-threatening. However, when combined together and left untreated, they have the potential to cause an extremely unhealthy mental state primarily consisting of rapid mood swings.

In fact, according to clinical studies, compared to when they individually occur, the combination of depression and anxiety are deadlier as they create more severe symptoms, which take longer to resolve and they lead to more cases of suicide.

Fortunately, depression and anxiety may still be treated. Treating depression and anxiety is a long process, which length depends on the response of the patient. Once you suspect you have depression and anxiety, the best course of action is to seek the help of a doctor. The worst thing you can do is deciding to self-medicate because it may lead to addiction of substances. Always remember that depression and anxiety are mental illnesses that can be best alleviated with the expertise of a doctor.

Depression and anxiety generally have the same treatments. Here are the most common ways and

methods of treating your depression and anxiety.

1-Psychotherapy:
This is one of the front line methods in treating depression and anxiety. One of the most common forms of therapy is cognitive therapy such as engaging in positive self-talk and shooing away negative thoughts. If the root cause of your depression and anxiety is known, which is mostly not the case, you may also be exposed to such a situation and be allowed to confront and overcome your anxiousness through behavioral therapy. Cognitive and behavioral therapies may also be combined for a more effective therapy called cognitive-behavioral therapy.

2-Medications:
The use of medication is often combined with therapy. Among the most common medications for treating depression and anxiety benzodiazepines which include Xanax, Prozac, Klonopin and Ativan. If your doctor prescribed you with medication, strictly follow the dosage and repetition requirements because in cases of over dosage, they may lead to tolerance, dependence and substance abuse.

3-Self-help:
Treating depression and anxiety is best if you help yourself. Other than reliance to clinical therapies and medications, another way of increasing the chances of successfully treating depression and anxiety is through self-help such as exercise, relaxation and diet. Exercise is a good depression and anxiety reliever for you because it reduces muscle tension and metabolize excess body chemicals such adrenalin. Relaxing can also help you in coping with depression and anxiety because it is a form of mental exercise.

Relaxation techniques can help ease your tense body, breath better and erase you negative feelings. Proper diet is also crucial in treating depression and anxiety. Avoid coffee, cigarettes and sugar as they contain ingredients that make you more prone to feel depression and anxiety. Eat foods that are rich in vitamin B. You may also take supplements such as kava, chamomile, GABA and valerian teas. Ask your doctor what and what not to avoid and better plan with your nutritionist your meals for a healthier diet.

Here you'll find the best natural treatments for depression and anxiety, including the top 7 tactics on how to deal with depression The tactics offers a pretty straight forward approach to ending depression and anxiety using applicable tips and techniques that you can start using right away. Not only will you learn what to do when anxiety hits, but also how to cure it altogether from your life. Check it out now and learn how dealing with depression is easier than you think.

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Treatment For Anxiety Disorders and Depression

People suffering anxiety and panic disorders suffer various emotional and mental trauma and depression. Life can be a constant battle worrying about certain situations. It is almost like everything that you think of would finally lead you to panic about some imagined condition. It is also common
 for people going through depression to experience sleeplessness or insomnia.

People experiencing anxiety disorders suffer poor self image and tend to avoid all social gatherings. They live in their own inward world that they consider to be safe and keep worrying endlessly about things that would at normal times appear very trivial. The worst part about going through a depression is that most of the times, people are depressed about the fact that they are going through a depressed phase in life. This stops them from enjoying the joys of the present moment.

A lot of people seek medical help to treat depression. Unfortunately, anti-depressants and drugs cause severe side effects and they tend to be very addictive. Further, anxiety disorders are a problem with the mind and by trying to treat the physical symptoms like nervousness, sleeplessness; we are always trying to play to catch up rather than getting head on with the root cause of the problem and treating it.

As long as you live in the comfort zone, it is going to continue to be painful for the rest of your life. To get rid of depression and anxiety disorders and to start enjoying your life like you used to while you were a child, you need to make a commitment to walk out of the comfort zone and have an attitude to conquer your anxiety problems to enjoy a life of free self expression.

Even if you have tried a lot of methods and failed, One Move Method by Dr. Joe Barry will help you get rid of all your anxiety and depression related disorders forever in quick time like how it has helped several thousands of people get rid of panic attacks and anxiety related disorders. You will be amazed that some of the most profound solutions are actually simple and straight forward.

Even if you have tried all methods to cure panic attacks and failed, there is Hope. I cured my Panic Attacks and Anxiety Disorder Using Joe Barry's One Move Method.

Visit Anxiety Depression Disorder Now to read my Story and Discover how you can Get rid of your Panic Attacks forever by Treating the Root cause of panic attacks.

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Worry..Oh, Worry....

As we all know, some people worry too much. Rather than solving a problem, too much worry becomes the problem. Not only does excessive worry create personal suffering, but it also affects the people around the worrier. Worry is a fairly common, but potentially serious, condition. A recent survey suggests that one-third of all office visits to primary-care physicians are associated with some form of anxiety. Furthermore, it has been estimated that one-fourth of all people, over the course of a lifetime, will at some point suffer from symptoms associated with an anxiety-related diagnosis. The stress which accompanies worry can have serious physical implications, including an increased risk for blood pressure and heart ailments, depression, immune system deficiencies, and cancer.

TIPS FOR MANAGING WORRY:

• Find Connectedness: When we feel connected to something larger than ourselves (a group of friends, our families, work, a sense of the past, ideas, and religious or transcendent faith), we are less likely to worry.
• Seek Advice and Reassurance: We all need supportive feedback from others from time to time. Other people may have solutions to problems that we haven’t thought about. For reassurance, find people who know how to give it. Many of us spend a lifetime looking in all the wrong places for approval•
• Understand the Difference Between Good and Bad Worrying: Good worry implies having a sense of control in solving life’s problems. It involves examining alternatives and then coming up with a systematic plan for meeting a challenge. Unproductive worry involves engaging in repetitively hashing over the same ideas time and again, negative thoughts, and no real plan for meeting the challenge.
• Try to Do the Right Thing: Maintain your sense of integrity whenever you do something. Tell the truth. Obey the law. Keep to your promises. Let your conscience be your guide. Granted, we might tell an occasional lie or break a promise, and this is fairly common – but it also can set the stage for worry. We may think sometimes that we can get ahead in the world the easy way – but the price we pay could be excessive worry, among other penalties.
• Keep Yourself Financially Secure: Live below your means and put money into a savings account. Pay off credit card debts. Consider ways to live more simply as a way of managing your finances.
• Learn the Value of Judicious Complaining: Sometimes it helps to talk your way through a prob-
  lem by complaining about it. Find a trusted friend
  and just let it all out. And then have a good laugh
  about it afterwards. If a friend is not available, write
  out your complaints.
• Add Structure to Your Life: Worry is often related to disorganization. Make a list of things to do each day and cross off tasks once they are completed. Leave early enough to make appointments on time. Put your keys in the same place every time you come home. Keep your house straightened up. When things are under control, there is less to worry about.
• Learn How to Let Go of Worries: This is a skill which might require some practice, and each of us will have our way of doing it. Some people do this by allowing themselves perhaps half
  an hour a day of worry time – and at the end of the allotted time period, they will be free of worrying until the next day. Some people give up their worries by writing them down on a piece of paper and then tearing up the paper. Some people prefer to hand them over to a higher power. There are mindfulness meditation techniques for letting go of your worrisome thoughts – just decide not to participate in anxiety-provoking thinking. Let the thoughts go (this method takes practice and uses techniques that increase your awareness through meditation or prayer).
• Sleep and Eat Properly: Lack of sleep and a nutritious diet can make us irritable, distracted, and anxious – all conditions that set the stage for worry. (Try to be mindful of the problem of overeating, however, as a way of making your worries disappear.)
• Exercise: Lack of sleep and a nutritious diet can make us irritable, distracted, and anxious – all conditions that set the stage for worry. (Try to be mindful of the problem of overeating, however, as a way of making your worries disappear.) 
• Minimize Catastrophic Thinking: Some people find it difficult to keep perspective when faced with even a minor stressor. Not every mole means cancer and not every bill is going to lead to bankruptcy. Test out the reality of these situations by talking them over with a trusted friend.
• Don't Sweat the Small Stuff: And, in a sense, if you think about it, it’s almost all
  small stuff.

At Dr. Quintal and Associates we specialize in helping you cope and manage stress and can teach you how to manage worry. We provide a full service of counseling methods to provide individual treatment for each client. Please contact us at (941) 907-0525 for a free phone consultation.

For insight on topics such as these follow Dr. Quintal on Twitter and Facebook.

The Serenity Prayer

God grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
And wisdom to know the difference.

Growing Up in a Substance Abusing Household

Countless millions of adults in this country have a parent with a drinking or drug problem. The emotionally available parent is one who can read and validate the moods and needs of the children and who encourages their independence as they grow up.In these healthier households there is a sense of security, consistency and predictability. As the children grow up, they gain a feeling of trust and mastery in the world with the support of the parent.

But what happens in the dysfunctional household where alcohol or drugs dominate the domestic climate? When an adult has formed a dependence on alcohol or drugs, the normal give-and-take of everyday life can become disrupted. Rather than working through daily problems and frustrations and modifying behavior to adapt to these problems, there is always the drink or drug at the end of the day.
 
Have a drink and the problem goes away, at least in one’s mind. The parent is emotionally unavailable. Thus, the needs of the growing child are often ignored. The drunk or chemically influenced parent can hardly perceive the feelings of the child – and usually places his or her own needs over those of the child. Even if the parent is addicted to a substance but not using it at the time, there is still a tendency, because of how substance abusers approach the world and problems in general, to neglect the child’s needs. The healthy option for the chemically-dependent parent is to work on coming to terms with the impact of substance abuse on his or her own life and the life of the
family.

The Child Becomes Either Overly Responsible or Irresponsible

Children growing up in the substance abusing family cope by attempting to stabilize their chaotic environments and find ways to minimize conflicts or make the parent feel better. Later on they may become compulsive overachievers, taking pride in these behaviors they learned while growing up. They are the ones who help others, yet harbor anger when others don’t do for them to the extent that they do for others. Alternatively, siblings growing up in the same family might become irresponsible, hoping, as they did in childhood, that others might come through and take care of their needs. Regardless of the outcome, when they grow up they avoid looking openly into their own behavior and understanding the effect that it has on themselves and others.

Coping in Adulthood with a Legacy of Dysfunction

The first step in coming to terms with an emotionally conflicted childhood is to admit it, and this can be very difficult. We may have learned to use denial as a way of dealing with our parent’s substance abuse problem, in much the way our parent used denial in dealing with their own use of alcohol or drugs. It may seem that the pain is more easily handled when it is cast out of our minds. But it does not really go away. And the survival patterns we learned in childhood continue to interfere with happier experiences after we have grown up. It takes courage to confront the situation openly and honestly, but the payoff can be life changing. A healthy, functional, and satisfying life is possible and attainable.

For additional information and help dealing with the aftermath of growing up in a dysfunctional family please call us for a free consultation at 941-907-0525 or visit our website.

We can also be found on Facebook and Twitter.

The Roles Played Within the Dysfunctional Family

People who grew up with a parent who had a substance abuse problem often wonder how their brothers and sisters turned out to be so different. After all, everyone grew up in the same household, so why aren’t all the siblings alike? In all families, substance abusing or not, brothers and sisters need to claim their own unique identities. We need to find ways that we are not like others in the family, and this helps us to form our own identities and sense of self.  In the alcoholic or drug-abusing family each sibling finds his or her own unique way of coping with the conflicts. Claudia Black, an expert on adult children of alcoholics, and others have identified different roles that can emerge among siblings, each of whom tries to make sense of the chaos.

The Hero

These children try to make sure that the family appears normal to the rest of the world. They develop a strong sense of responsibility and project an image of competence and achievement. This is often the first-born child, but not always. They learn as children that someone has to be responsible for the family, and if the parents are inducing chaos, it is up to the “hero” to provide stability. These people often grow up to be academically or professionally successful, although they often deny their own feelings and may feel like impostors.

The Adjuster

In order to cope with the conflicts within the family, these people adjust – but often in inappropriate ways. They often become invisible and avoid taking a stand or rocking the boat. They learn never to plan or to expect anything, and they deal with conflict by avoiding it. In adulthood “adjusters” may feel that their lives are out of control and that they are drifting meaninglessly.

The Placater

These siblings are the ones who learn early to smooth over potentially upsetting situations in the family. They develop a good ability to read the feelings of others, but at the expense of their own feelings. They tend to go into care-taking professions later in life, even though this may reinforce their tendency to ignore their own feelings.

The Scapegoat

These are the children who become known as the family problem. They have a tendency to get into trouble, including alcohol and drug abuse, as a way of expressing their anger at the family. They serve as the “pressure valve” in the family: when tension builds, they misbehave as a way of relieving pressure while allowing the family to avoid dealing with the parent’s drinking problem. When they grow up, they tend to be unaware of feelings other than anger.

Did you or someone you love grow up dealing with the substance abuse problem of a parent or family member?  

We can help you get free of emotional trauma and wounds resulting from these experiences. Contact us today for a free consultation: http://www.drquintal.com/free-therapy-consultation/

Suggestions for Experiencing Grief

Grieving is a Major Process in Everyone's Life

All of us grieve in different ways, depending on the circumstances of the death, our own personal characteristics, and the meanings attached to the death by those left behind. Nonetheless, there are some specific actions that most of us can take to complete the process in a way that allows us to move on, eventually, to a whole and meaningful life again. 

__________________________________________

Here are some real-life concerns to keep in mind during the grief process:

Give yourself some quiet time alone. Find a good balance between being around others and giving yourself some solitude so that you can reflect on your loss and process your feelings.

Allow yourself to have some breaks from your grief. Grieving is difficult. As in any hard job you need a break from it from time to time. Go out and try to have a good time with friends. Read a good book. Lose yourself in a good movie.

If possible, avoid making long-term decisions. Times of crisis decrease our ability to make rational
decisions. Put decisions off until things have settled down to a more stable pattern.

Take care of your health.  Grief is a time of high physical risk. Even though it may be difficult, try
to get some physical exercise, even if it is only a daily walk. Maintain a nutritious diet, but don’t avoid indulging in special treats occasionally since self-nurturing is important during the process.
Above all, avoid alcohol and drugs during this time. They may provide a temporary feeling of relief, but your goal should focus on grieving productively, not avoiding it.

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Grieving is a very personal experience and one of our most painful to endure. It is also a journey into
the depths of our lives that can ultimately reveal our strength of character.

If you find that your are having trouble moving on with your life after a significant period of time, or staying positive after a losing a loved one, there are types of therapy that can help assist you with this process. Please contact Dr. Jason Quintal at 941-907-0525 or visit www.drquintal.com for an overview of treatments provided. A free phone consultation is offered. You can also follow Dr. Quintal on Twitter and Facebook.